In one of the traditions that forms my personal practice reconciliation refers to a wide body of ritual lore and magical formulas aimed at reconciling lovers who have parted ways. Reconciliation work is the most commonly requested service, period. More than general love drawing, more than sex & romance, more than the blessing of children & families, and more than any kind of money drawing work you can think of, folks look to magic & ritual when their heart’s are broken and hurting.
Any professional cunning man or woman worth their salt is upfront & honest with potential clients-reconciliation work is difficult, usually long term, and even in the best of circumstances faces more challenges that other types of magical ritual work. In other words, these are difficult cases. Yet clients still seek it out, pay for it, and when things work out everyone feels like something major has been accomplished.
There are some excellent places on the web where you can learn about the traditions surrounding romantic reconciliation as well as the herbs, roots, and curios used in ritual work that has reconciliation as its goal. But today I want to talk about the spiritual component of reconciliation.
Theologically reconciliation deals with one aspect of salvation-the re-uniting of the soul with the Divine, the Source of All. In the Catholic church the act of Confession is sometimes called the Sacrament of Penance and Reconciliation. Now some people see God/Goddess/Spirit in Christ on the cross, or in Our Lady of Guadalupe, or in Cerridwen, or in the Green Man, or in Yaweh, or in Yemayah, or Buddha, or Krishna, or in the stones, plants, animals, and living soil on which they live. Most religious traditions agree that as it is above, so it is below-that we, each of us, have a share in the divine, in the Godhead, in the Source of All. That means that when we seek to reconcile with our own sense of the Divine we must first reconcile with ourselves. I don’t think its an accident that many mystical traditions the Gnostic Christianity and Sufism to name a couple, view God as the ultimate lover & beloved-when we seek out the Divine we do so from an impulse to know and love more deeply and truly.
This is why spiritually speaking romantic reconciliation work is so difficult to achieve-not because people fuss & fight or because broken up relationships are beyond repair, but because, as Confucius says-we must look within first and address our shortcomings before commenting on someone else’s. We must look within and see clearly-warts and all our own illusions, shortcomings, fears, mis-placed prides–we have to deal with our crap. Once we see it clearly we can acknowledge and address the scars, the blocks, and illusions. We can apply a healing balm to those parts of ourselves that have been wounded, cut up, and isolated, we can summon a bit of breath and brightness to our hidden places,–we can reconcile in, of, and with ourselves and in so doing acknowledge our own blessed divinity.
Reconciliation is not for all times and places. It is specific work applied at particular moments in a day, a week, a month, a life. But if you are feeling the “fracking F’s” as I call them: fragmented, fractured, fearful, and frazzled-then it might be time to consider reconciling with the greatest lover of all-yourself.
*The above image was snapped while I was on vacation in Santa Fe. These rough, hand made wooden crosses are arrayed around Our Lady of Guadalupe’s Sanctuary on, appropriately enough, Guadalupe street. Each cross has been embellished with prayers and petitions-usually humble requests dealing with the business of daily life–needs of health, finances, family peace, and success. Once the petition is written down the crossed are hung around Our Lady for her blessing.